Fezda Microzapper

A Gnomish Tinker from Ironforge and unofficial priest. Designs inventions that most over Gnomes could never think of and would never think of. An artificially young Gnome hoping to find more work in Stormwind now her contract in Ironforge has expired, she hopes to make the world a better place no matter how long it takes her or how many people suffer on the way.

Name/Title
Fezda Microzapper, Controversial weaponsmith extrordinaire.

Physical Traits
Fezda is an elderly Gnome of 195 years old. However, due to an accident several years ago while trying to weaponise cuteness she gained the appearance and all other biological aspects of a much younger Gnome, she is currently about 40 years old physically.

Fezda is very cute, even by Gnome standards. She has a few freckles around her nose, clumsily styled hair which she has redone every 2 years, a slight lisp, and a child like complexion. She also always wears oversized impractical goggles and a dirtied robe. She is also very quick to blush, she claims this is due to high blood pressure.

She enjoys elaborate justiculation whillst talking, and often speaks slowly and carefully, as if she thinks you're stupid. Which she does. And you are.

Personality.
Fezda wants to make the world a better place, desiging fantastic inventions for everyone to use, free of charge (terms and conditions apply). Her way of thinking is a little different from most however, and her idea to make the world a better place is by equipping the Alliance with her own special brand of weaponry in hopes of ending the war in quick, fairly awe-inspiring if not horrific, stroke.

While the majority of her inventions are weapons, she does also enjoy creating helpful inventions, such as balls which gain energy as they bounce, and a bomb that explodes with all the glorious colours and sounds of a normal bomb, but causes no damage (research ongoing).

Fezda is careless (or as she puts it; care-free) and stubborn (she says persistant). Once an idea is in her head, she wont stop acting on it until it is done, and she is unlikely to ever admit that it could have been a bad idea despite the fact that it often is. She often speaks as if noone else is around, showing no care as to whatanyone listening may think.

She is ridiculously proud, proclaiming Gnomes the greatest race that has ever lived and claiming herself to be the greatest Gnome that ever lived. She often responds to criticism with hostility which can make her hard to get along with. At the same time her manic optimism and willingness to help (regardless whether she was asked) make it impossible to hate her, most of her friends alternate between loving and hating her when needed.

Guild
Tinker and barely qualified surgeon of G.N.O.M.E.

Occupation
Fezda is a weaponsmith and toymaker, seeing no reason why the two shouldn't overlap. She is both respected and alienated by other tinkers for her specialty in fairly controversial if not utterly insane designs. Marketing BB-guns with nitroglycerin tipped pellets at children in hopes that it will teach the youth about gun safety, and creating weapons such as the 'Critter Cannon' to ensure soldiers will not run out of ammo while on the field, and the 'Lewd Suggestion Ray' as an attempt to help break the ice while conversing with the opposite gender, the sort of ideas that make sense on paper if you cover up the fine details, have it over explained to you and if you possess the same train of thought as someone like Fezda (you probably don't).

She also possesses a rare degree in Anachrism; the study of anachronyms.

She previously worked as a medic back in Gnomeregan, but was unfortunately banned from any sort of official medical work after replacing someones heart with a tire pump, the surgery saved their life but now they need to hire someone to pump their blood for them.

Family
Being as old as she is most of Fezdas family passed away, and Fezda never got around to getting a family herself. But since she claims to be immortal, she believes there's plenty of time.

Background
Fezda was born in Gnomeregan, obviously. Fezda was raised by her mother, a medic, and her father, a mage until she was 20, after which she became a medic, using magical abilities as more of a backup. After saving a mans life by designing a life sized robotic lung out of an old life support system, she took up the hobby of tinkering, this lead to the end of her medical career after replacing a mans heart with a tire pump.

After losing her job as a medic she decided to expand her tinkering capabilities and went on to study engineering up until the fall of Gnomeregan, absolutely nothing life changing or emotionally scarring happened during this, she was planning on leaving soon anyway and everyone she knew survived, she actually feels left out.

After being relocated to Ironforge she took up a job as a weaponsmith, using the several blueprints she had brought with her from Gnomeregan. The Dwarves refused to use most of her weapons, with the exception of the 'Body Alcohol Extractor', due to the somewhat ridiculous nature of them, she was encouraged to continue by her Gnome peers however, despite their refusal to be in the same room as her during the final moments of an inventions creation.

During the final testing of her invention; the 'Cuteness Abundance Transmitter' designed to be powered by kittens to either drive enemies into a catonic state with an over abundance of sheer adorability, or to simply endear children, She plugged herself into the cuteness outlet being unable to aquire cute enough kittens. A backfire caused a 'Universal Adorability Youth Loop' which biologically reverted Fezda back to an adorable young adult. There was alot of demand to have this weapon be marketed as a form of cosmotherapy, but both the gun and the blueprints were destroyed in the backfire, she has since been working on a way to replicate the results, hopefully before she grows old again.

After regaining her youth and gaining newfound cuteness she was able to gain success through her engineering as no matter how horrifyingly absurd an invention may be, you lose all sight of any adverse results when the idea is beig presented to you by what resembles a 5 year old with a masters degree.

Inventions

 * Instant Rainbow Projector


 * Itch Bomb


 * Incontinence Beam


 * Lewd Suggestion Ray


 * Feline Mind Control


 * Critter Cannon


 * My First Grenade Launcher


 * Boomless Dynamite


 * Critter Cannon


 * Murloc Translator


 * Auto-Nanny
 * Anarchy Inducer
 * Cataclysm Predicter (Sales significantly dropped after it failed to notice the whole Deathwing buisness, Fezdas lawyers are currently working on this)
 * Religious Doubt Magnifier
 * Afterlife Portal

Criminal Record
Several harsh warnings from Ironforge to be less reckless with her inventions, and one count of arrest for possession of illegal weaponry.

Personal Notes
Her Goggles don't do anything

After cheating death once her life goal is to achieve immortality.

Has been proclaimed as evil, she takes great offense to this.

Seriously, she is just ridiculously cute.

Quotes
"Success!"

"You are cute, and I know cute"


 * inane giggling*

"Apparently it is 'inhumane' "

"I'm perfect!"

Current Status
Liable to snap at any minute.