Once again I have started to make me own memoars of my life. Once again in my life I have become a Merc. After leaving the Watch it seemd as a good idea. Me and the rest of them that did leave the Watch are now forming the Free Company. And Caliyen will lead us as out Captian. After that I did talk to her when the idea did get born. We desided that we should move out to the North and work there.
The past few days we have been gathering supplies and all the things we need to move out . Benny and me did work on the wagons all morning. But now they are once ready to be used once again. I wounder what is pusseling Caliyens mind today. Even if both of us where cinda quiet all day. I was lucky that we did have some spare time over to spend it on our self. So we did take our horses and the then the boat over to Fareales. As we did wander around there we did see a Horde campment there. Caliyen did say we should go around it, as we did to. But as I was thinking on something eals then looking where I was going I did fall down to the water.
After that we both did swim to the shore and started to talk about that we should not hide our love agaist each other. And lucky me we will even share a wagon together.
But that is all for now.
Under the Night
Cant sleep for the moment becus it is to hot in here. And then it was the dream. Even if it is not the first time I have seen it, but it scares me to death every time. I am in a dead field some where in the North in both armor and me Grand Fathers sword. And I hear whispering sounds from my family telling me all cinda things. Then all of a sudden I see Caliyen standing on the other side of the field. As fast as I start to move agaist her the undead appers infront of me. I try to manage to save Caliyen formthe horde of undead but as I come close her she dies by one of them. So there I stand cuting them down by the hundred. I see how all blood flys around me. And I awake in a scream. Luckly iy is just a mare dream. I should try to get some sleep now.
That is all for now.
Damn what a night it was. When we did arrive to the Pyrewood Village under the day every thing was alright. And by the looks of it I did think that the "this farmers" have seen much fights under there time. And we did aquire some rooms in the tavern for the day as the Nobalman was coming to us the day after. We where there for some hours and I did get the urge to walk around a bit. So I did walk outside of the town and did walk to the shore. Damn what a misstake that was, as I did walk back I was attacked by this damn worgans. They where transmutet from the humans I did see a moment before.
As I did fight back to the tavrn I must have slip or someting as I dont recall what happen after that. As I did wake up some one had sowed my wounds and places bandages on them. Then the the fight started to get out from there as all the people in the town did become Worgans. Damn. It was some time ago when I did fight this much as I did this nihgt.
And as you see you old took We did make it, alive and in one pice. We did seek refuge at the Gray wall. And I think that we will sty here for some days to. The nobalman did come to . What an idiot, even if I do understand him it seems that he has lost someting. Maybe he is just stupid I dont know.
I should get some rest now, Caliyen is already sleeping and snores a little. Thats all for now.
Under the night
What a day, Every thing did go from worse to even worser. Shally getting kidnapped and then losing her baby. What a night. It is mindsickning to even think on all this. I think that I am getting to fucking old for all this shit. Killing undeads I can do. As you are there you get pust, and when that happens killing is as easy as breathing. But this is not easy. Poor lass, to much in one day, unlucky Shally.
FUck it all I am going to bed and getting some freacking sleep and maybe get a drink to eash me thinking.
Under the morning
Last evening was really not a slow one, with the attacks from the worgans and the new recruits. The past few days have been much happning. But last evening was a special one. The worgans did attack our camp even if we did have as five fiers up close to the woods. They where in such a freanzy that I never have seen before. They did attack us over and over again. Lickly we did have the canon and Morrises grandaes of what they where. They did help a damn much under that fight. But in the end there did come the leader of the buggers. A large white one with armor and shit. He was fast to. And as I did slam the hammer on it, it did just lift me up and did run away. As it did run I droped me hammer and tried to stabb it with me dagger on the shoulder. It did bite me shoulder but luckly the armor did hold it. Then the fucker did bring me to his fuck nest in some mine. Did throw me against the wall and kncoked me out. What a fucker he was, eh? But he did have things coming for him.
Ahh well I will finish this shit later today. All from me now.
Under the Day
- You can see some water stains on the page*
Crap I start to feel the pain now again. After the ride we did on the farms and did scout them out for a moment. When that was done with I did take a stroll to Southshore and did talk to the doc there. Luckly he did know me from me younger days and dident want so much paid. A mead and some silvers are always welcomed betwen friends if you ask me. When I was sitting on the old wooden chair I did think on what did happen to Tika, dident see that much of him but I did hear that he did hurt hic back plenty much. And that Nomine. He should go and look for mental help and get locked up, and make some oen throw the key away and forget that Nonmine was in the room. Enough for that ass hole. Did make some fishing there to. Just and just that I did get up the fishing net, damn it did hurt when I did pull it back up on the boat. But out here it is so wounderful. By the light I should fish more. Take with me Caliyen and show her some tricks.
But enough of the goos stuffs time to row back and get moving to the camp. Enough for now.
Some time under the late morning
- The whriting is really bad and unstable, even some old tears is on the page, some of it has smudged a little on the letters making it hard to read*
Fuck me. What did happen to me. What did I do agaist Caliyen. What did send this feelings to me? What was it. The hole fucking night is a large question mark for me. That what I did do agaist her. And what she did do. There is something in this woods that is more powerful then what we are. And it haves a mind of tricks and mind games, just for us. But the next time I will be ready for the mother fucker. I guess that it was some of Nomines little fucking people that he has sent. Targeting Caliyen and me. But I wounder why Caliyen, he has never been after her in that way. Maybe a way to just confuse me into something. But pay back is sweet and it will happen soon.
Fuck it, enough for me.
Today we will attack the farms as we start to think that the Milita cant do it, and it was the original contract from Lord Stane. So today will be toungh but in some way a new one. As this will be a battle that we did make a choise to have. All others where not desided by us that we should fight. Stil a little chocked from last nights events. But this fight will make me think clear and make me come one step closer to find my sisters walking dead body. I will find you, Be sure about it.
Enough for now.
Under the evening and Night
What a great ending on my day. Standing close to the canon under the fight was not what I really wanted but better safe then sorry. The fight went smoth and good. Did see that our people where a little egar to make the attack. One of the men hasent even seen the undead before, but he did well. He was a good shot.
But now I am sitting close to Caliyen near the fire. Fishing with her is great. even if she was a little unlucky in the start. but she did get some fish in the end there. Hillsbrad, it is a wounderful place. I am the must luckyest man in this part of the world. And the question she did give me " Would you like me more if I was human" , cant say that I did see that coming. But I would not change any thing with her. She is perfect as she is. I hope that she did like the neckless I did make her. The ring will look good hanging there.
Well she did go on a small walk now. But as she did leave it fells like some one more is here. Listning. Maybe I am just over doing it but, heh. Maybe should go and talk to me older Brother in the farms here when I am so close any way. But I should take a trip to them before we leave any ways. IT was some time ago when I did see them all.
But that is all I have to write now.
Much has happend under this days now. Last day I did meet my brothers and talked about our sister. And I and they did think I was the best person to be send to the north to take care of it. I just want to see her soul rest in peace, walking around as an undead is not meant to any living one in this world. I dont even want my worst enemys do become one. But the more I start to think on this the more I want to go there alone, even if I want Caliyen and the rest with me. But I think that the rest cant hadle it up there. Shally would never do it. Mailia would go mad for some one would be gone for one moment to long. Caliyen I know would handle it as she has been there before. So I think that I shall go there alone or with Caliyen. Argent Dawn will give me a good pay when I am up there to. Maybe I should join them. But as Caliyne said I would just fight and parish in some years. But I dont think that the Free Company shall come with us. They can take some time of and spend there money on there own living.
And now I have seen the lands of the Blood Elfs. It was a wounderful place. Never seen trees or animals like I did see there. It was there i did see how muhc Caliyen does hate this High elfs or Blood elfs. But the lands was a place of wounders. I have a strnge feeling that someting more will happen soon.
Thats all for now.
Under the Night
- Some ash has burned some small holes on the paper around the text*
Some times I do hate that my feelings are right. Caliyen did just tell me that she was forced to travel back to her home lands and talk to the elders or something about her leaving the Sentinels for two years. And all thanks for a idiot to little sisters of hers. But I guess there is not that much we can do what we are told. I will leave with Caliyen over there later. She needs all the suport I can give her. She did warn me that her sister would be there when we where goign to arrive in Darkshore I guess. And that I should be calm infront of her little sister so things dident go worse. I will be as calm as I can so I dont get Caliyen in deeper problems. Never seen her cry as I did see her doing it now. by the think of it I think that I never have seen it. But it is understandble. If they want the can force her to join the Sentinels once again. But with some luck she dosent need to I hope.
I think that I shall lay down with her now and hold her so she feels that I love her. All for now.
Under the Morning
The last past days has been confusing and given me much sorrow. As when Caliyen where going back to her home for talking to the elders. Damn her sister. She will be gone for some weeks now. I know that she will come back soon. They will and must understand that she is more needed here and that she is not ready to go back to become a Sentinel again. Even if we havent known each other for that long but as we have been sleeping in the same bed for some weeks now, it feels a little empty here in the wagon.
And then we did have Amy redcross last night. Dident think that making a contract would go that fast. But it did and today we are moving into the northen lands in Kalimador or what it was now again. So I am spliting the trupps for two days. It will be hard when we come home to assult the last farms. But it is needed and I think that we will do it good.
All for now, still much to do now.
Under the day
Holy shit there has been much to do, we have got the damn rag til tabard and made the Head quaters in Ironforge good enough so we can move in now. Did send a letter to Caliyen sister now so I hope that she will get it. More then that the problem betwin Mailia and the quatersmasters asst Yvar, is still up. They both dont do anything agaist it. But fuck it. If they dont get better I know what I must do to make it alright again.
have been reading a book from the autor Margaret Wies, even the name on the book was intresting "Drangonlance Choronivles Volume one". Very intresting and even funny book. But I should get to the recruting work maybe.
All for this time.
Crap what a cold I haved this past few days. But it seems to be better. Been thiking much on Caliyen trying to rember her smell and how she did snore from time to time. Lets hope that the elders understand that she is not ready for sentinel duty and is more needed here then over there. Dammit she haves almoste a new family here. And that her damn sister will get what is coming for her, a life alone! Did eat some oranges and for the first time a yellow fruit that was called a banana. Maybe should order in more of this fruits into the compeny.
- This part is writen in a better and not as shaky hand-writing as before*
If I could go after you and bring you back to me I would do it for what ever the prise would be.
- That ends here*
Under the Night
She is back in my life, and I could not be more happy to have her back agian. But she haves thinga that bother her, I will try to make her feel better so she will smile more again. Abomenation, lets hope that will not be true. What then?
I need some sleep, fuck this.
Under the day
Long time we have been talking to one and other, eh? Well my long time away mena that I have just dubble much to tell you. Or tell you, sonds so dman fanzy. All that I whrite here is so I can one day rember all the things I have done in my older days, not me oldest as there will come many pages here, many many more to come. But now I just want to write that things betwin me anc Caliyne has changed. Just hope that all is for the good. Shally has pulled out some deamns from her when they have been talking. Lets just hope that was to some good.
Need to take a look at the meat now. All for now.
8th of October
Under the morning
(The page is dirty from blood stains and some dirt)
Where is my life taking me, first I started out as a soldier in the military. Proud over it and advanst into the better stock where I did get my plase as a Captian over a batalion. Nathall, Malborn, Bowie, Erika, Sarrah, Kett and all other of my old friends, they where my best buddies and we did look after one and other. I and Nathall was one of the last ones that did quit the military. Erika must have a big family now. Did get a letter from her some years ago telling me that she did have seven boys. Seven and she is just thirty-five. We all where like a family. And one by one we did fall apart. Good momoris we have and good ones they shall be.
Now I am here in some damn run down hous protecting my own arse from the undeads outside. And I know that when I come back that I will just fall back into the same thing once again. But that is what I am. There is nothing that I can chance in it. I fight for a living and I will die with a sword in my hand. The tobaco will soon be no more. Damn.
Once I was even a sailor for a short period of five weeks. Did even leave them as they where some damn Pirates. And they are still that for me. The Kul tiras, sailors of jackasses.
And now I am a mercenary once again. My life is in the peak, Caliyen is a great person that I want to share my whole life. I just hope that she will take me back for this. But my family has been there when I have needed them and now I shall be there for my dead sister so she will rest in peace. Her grave is ready just the body that needs to get "hunted" down now.
Dreams are good but not when I see Caliyen fight over the undeads alone, just to save me.
Fuck this and lest keep on fighting, all for now.
It feels like all life in me are gone, I have never feelt this what I have felt. All pain, and that we dont have the knowlage to know what was the problem. Caliyen i have seen you cry when you think that I was sleeping, or I was but still not. With no power to move no power to think just to feel the pain in my body, mind and spirit. All of my dreams have been a living nightmare with demons and undeads that have killed me or Caliyen over and over again. This was one of the times that I would wish that I was dead.
The doctors was here for just a moment ago saying that I was feeling better. And that he has never seen this sickness before. Fuck me what a living pice of shadowsness nether my life has been this past weeks have been. But there is still some damn life in this old body. Not for my self but for Caliyen. She needs me as much as I need her.
I have even seen in Shally that she has been worried for me. Even if she has tried to not show it for me or Caliyen. All love to all of them that are around me, I will always be there for them as I am a friend and partner to thos I love and I will be damned if I cant be a helping hand tp them that has been there fror me.
By the light, I need to get some sleep now. I will be there, Caliyen I will be there. All for now.
-=Sometime in November=-
Once again I am afraid that I must leave Caliyen behind once again as I know that my Cousin can´t hold the farm up and going. Why is all the Defias moving over here now. They have keep on moving closer and closer all the time and with the new damn invasion going on Stormwind or Westfalls doesn’t have any guards or any soldiers to spare to protect Ann Stillwell. Damn, once again I have left her alone with out saying much. Caliyen is a understanding woman but third time in a row. She has left for Northrend already. The one and only I don’t want to leave me. But this is family and they do always come first. She must understand. If not, all was for nothing.
I have been there now for a couple of days already. Ann dosent say that much. Being alone here with the Defias that haves been attacking weekly and raiding in the night for whatever they can steal almost every night. It is wounders that any thing can grow in this dry place. The cold is not helping that much either but the littel that we get is good enough for making a living.
Aron is growing fast here, seems that he likes it over here. Much freach air around here and then he haves the other pup to play with here to. Ann did tell me more about her old husband, how he got killed. The army is a place where it is just black and white, and even some times when shit comes around the gray times pop up to as a dog eating on your arse. Light give us Strength.
First time today we all did go down to the beach and did take a swim in the sea there. Even Ann did come along with us, carrying a shotgun just in chase. There must be something in the family with always carrying a weapon of some cind all the time. Good weather down there when you did clear of the Murlocks that did linger close by. But some hours of resting and swimming did happen. I did noteish that Elly was looking at me quite much when I was swimming, don’t know if she was scared of me scars or what she was looking at that much.
I have sent some letters to Caliyen but I have not got any answer from her yet. Maybe she is to proud to come and get me or just making a point. I just hope that she can give me forgiveness. Many say that if you don´t have a woman you will not cry, but even that they are needed to complete us as a man. And I know that a world without Caliyen is an empty one.
-=Sometime in December-
I still have got no answer from Caliyen, I can’t understand her at the moment. This time I did send her letters telling where I am and asking about how everything was. But I don’t get an answer. Time here is soon over and I should take my leave, but where. Much as I know Caliyen can have thrown out all of my stuff into the streets and let the guards clean the shit away. Her pipe that she gave me has been a good reminder of her. Sounds strange but when I smoke in the evenings and look at the stars or the moon I cinda fell Caliyen close by. Just for a moment. And some times that is all what is needed.
All for nothing and nothing for everything.
-=Sometime in the begging Jan=-
All here is done now, time to come home. Time to move on with my life, a letter did come some days ago to me. A small one. Dident belive my eyes when I did see that it was from Calieyen that did send it. She did say something that I needed to hear. That she wanted me to come back. That was enough for a person like me. Just something. Layal my new horse will like the long ride to Ironforge. I hope that she will be there when I come. All I ever needed is her, all I ever wanted is her.
This is family but the more I think on it, Caliyen is my family that I need to look after.
Jan the 17
Once I´m back into the world that I loved, one again into the arms of the one that I love. Time seemed to stop and in some ay go on as it always hade done. All was to good to be truth in some way, even if I tried to just puch out that emption out from my head and think on the luck I´m in with Caliyen. Days went when I did sty with her hours and hours. Just wraping my arms around her in her sleep and kiss her on the forehead. All that I wanted is here, in my arms.
But as the days of simple happiness did go on with eas. I did take out Aron out on a walk in Ironforge. I started to see a wagon of hurted Dwarfs and even some humans in it. SOme had lost there legs or arms, some even both. At first I did just think how I could help thos lads. And in the same time I did think out that I need to go there. Out into Northrend and fight and do every thing that I can to help. I rhused over to a friends hous to dump of Aron there for the time while. Even if I wanted the dog with me I know that he would not like the sea tripp over there. When that was ready I did run over to the hous and did gatther up my plate armor and some cloths into a large backpack. All that I needed to for just the simple task to kill an other living thing.
I did walk over to the Flight Master just to order a ride to Wetlands so I could take a boat from there. THen It hit me that I cant leave Caliyen behind me again. This time she will leave me forgood. So I walked around the city looking for her. Lucky I found her at the Bank. My sweet heart did shine up when she did see me there. But I did see the sorrow in her eyes as I did say that I needed to talk with her outside. She accepted and did walk after me. I told her of what I was going to do, and asked her to follow me so we dident need to be alone once again. I was afraid that she could have said no to me as she has already been there some time. But I was lucky that she did want to. Almoste runing over to the Flight Master waiting for her to gather up her armor and things she needed I wounderd what cinda shit I was going to see there, was I even going to survive this time?
The days whent over here in Northrend. The boat ride was something that I will never forget in my life. All the boats that dident made it. Burning and sunken half down into the water. Even dead bodys was floating around in the water. I did fight there side by side with others. Caliyen did her own thing and did come from time to time to help us. The Soldiers seems to give her a respect that I have only once seen before. And that was in the Night Watch. IF she has said to jump they would only awnser "how high?".
At first all seems good here. But fast it turned out that Caliyen was holding something back, something that did bother her. And I did see it. I tried to get it out from her but I did fail. Failed that trying to talk to her. All I did was to make her and my self angryer. It all went over board when she started to call the working men in towns was something Lesser. A lesser man just becus they work? If they hadent done that we would all have died at the beach there. In anger I did leave her alone. I needed to settle down my anger with something. All that I needed was something to forge. Just to make any thing. When I worked there I did feel how all started to settle down. Hammering on the hot Iron. I was at peace. Tills I heard Caliyen voise that did tell there was something better for me to do, even that this was a bt better then a Carpenter as she always did call it. Bahh.
And then the fight betwin us. She started to call me weak. And she dident love any thing that was weak. I dont know why but, she did pull orut her blade and started to tell me why her blade was dull. Becus I left she stoped to sharpen it. From talking she started to lightly attack me with her blade. IT was easy at an start to deflect and parry her attacks. Every attack did go a bit fast a bit harder. Soon she did fight as she was trying to hurt me. For a long time I could not attack her. I held me back. But at some point something dident hold me back. I at first did pouch her in her sloppy attacks. I could see the anger in her eyes. Or then it was something that I could not understand. Every thing in my bubbeld up and I started to attack her. Fast and swiftly I did puch her back inch by inch. After some moment I did throw a kick at her side so she did fall down. Almoste in the same time I did place my dagger agaist her neck and shoulder when she did kneel infront of me. I holsterd my blade and falled to my knees infront of her.
From there all once again started to be alright. She is now still sleeping. Her lovely snoring that I have missed. Naked as she was, I cant stop looking at her with a smile.
Enough shit for now.
Nargrand, what a woulderful and fantastic place to be. My first memory of Willow will be when we did go there the first time with Caliyne. The feelings that you get when flying around there in the air is just something that I never have feelt before. The moment I did fly there did fell like hours of happiness and no problems. On that we did have a picknick on one of the floating islands. The rest is history as they say.
( There is a leafe here in betwin the pages, a large one that seems not to be from Azaroth )
I did gain a gift from Caliyen. The pendant. The silver did glitter in the shallow light. The chrest on it, the moon. It mees much for me that it was something that has to do with her past, as a Night elf.
Enough for this time.
Dont know really how I shall whrite this so even I can understand it later on when I once read this again, sometime. Cloundent sleep. Need to whrite this down now. But a couple of day ago when we where in Stormwind I and Caliyen did take a peaceful drink. All went well tills some mother fucking abomenation of a big cat did attack us. Just out from the blue. The damn cat did have some sharp claws but we did show it that we dont need claws to be dangerus. Even the State did come in and did there work.
Many did come there from the Free Company, just as if they did know what was happening. Benny, Tyre and Tathia. As we did come to the stockade to getsome medical help all shit did break lose. Something did play with out heads, showing us wrong things. Dead children hanging from the lapposts. Dont know what did make me go wild, but I did think that if I fight the shit in the same way I would win in the end. It did help as I did see it before the other, but that dident help. But all the images that I did get from this thing, it fellt that it was Shally or some one really close to shally that did attack us. Damn her. If this was her. Damn her into the twisting Nether. In the end we did succsed to "destroy" it.
Lucky that it was only me that got hurt under the small attack with this thing. I did see under the night that even Caliyen was afraid. She dident snore when I did wake up under the night. She did seem as she was in a bad dream.
Yesterday was our first meeting in some time with the Free Company in some time. Feels good to see all old faces again, even if it was not every one. But it is a start. We did once start in lower numbers then what was in the meeting.
I think that it is time to lay down again. Hold Caliyen so she will feel protected. This time it is my turn to protect her. All for now.